


Everything sounds easier in theory (even birds)

by disestablishmentarianism



Series: Bird Neighbors AU [2]
Category: Daredevil (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Neighbors, Fluff, Gen, M/M, Pre-Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-05
Updated: 2015-05-05
Packaged: 2018-03-29 03:11:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,427
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3880060
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/disestablishmentarianism/pseuds/disestablishmentarianism
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Foggy should be working and maybe making Marci less mad at him for blowing off her booty call. Instead, he's flirting with a near-stranger who is known to occasionally yell at birds.<br/>(Foggy is a genius and Matt should be swooning by now)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Everything sounds easier in theory (even birds)

Despite that it takes Foggy only 4 minutes on Google to figure out that Matt’s winged terror is an Ovenbird, it takes the two of them much longer to brainstorm how to get rid of the damn thing.

“We could...um… cover up the windows?” Foggy muses, his phone (with 6 missed calls from Marci) tucked away in his pocket.

Matt hums a little and shifts his feet from where the two of them are standing, shoulders nearly touching (only 3 inches!!), looking out the window. Well, in Foggy’s case looking. Matt, Foggy assumes, only faces the window out of the expectation to. They’ve gone through multiple ideas by now, all of them turned down. It’s way past 7 by now, Foggy knows, and honestly he’s pretty much resigned himself to the fate of a pissed Marci when he finally gets to her apartment. It’s worth it, and he’ll survive the ordeal. Probably.

“Isn’t the problem the reflection, though?” Matt says. “If you covered up the windows from the inside then it wouldn’t impair the reflection on the glass.”

“True.”

They stand in silence for a minute before Foggy sighs loudly and shakes his head.

“I don’t think we’re gonna be able to solve this on our own, buddy. I’m gonna have to do some serious consulting with Yahoo Answers and youtube,” Foggy finally admits. “I’m dreading leaving you alone to this monster, but I’ve got work and no ways of fixing this problem. Raincheck?”

Matt, who seems crestfallen when Foggy mentions leaving, perks up at the idea of seeing each other again.

“I’d appreciate it, Foggy,” Matt grins and turns away from the window to reach into his pocket. “I could give you my number in case you find out any miraculous fixes to my problem…?”

Foggy’s pretty sure his heart skips a beat, and Jesus _yes_ , that blush is _definitely_ turning Matt’s ears pink. He fumbles getting his phone out but thankfully Matt doesn’t notice (he’s glad Matt doesn’t notice a lot of things about him).

“Yeah! That’d be great, um, purely for research purposes,” Foggy says, and most definitely doesn’t do a victory dance later in the hallway when he looks at his contacts and sees _Matt Murdock_ listed.

****

Marci is beyond pissed when Foggy finally shows up on her doorstep, an hour late, but Foggy takes her yelling like a champ. His groveling and apologizing is worth it later when she forgives him and tells him that a flawless way to get rid of birds is to put a picture of his own face in the window, because that would “scare off any birds in two seconds flat”.

He realizes later (thankfully before he sends the idea to Matt) that this is meant as an insult. Honestly, he thought Marci cared more. Doesn’t she realize that his soul, heart, and reputation are on the line here?

***

(9:26 AM) **Maybe a recording of voices would scare the bird off?**

(9:27 AM) _I’ve tried it with television, but I’ll see if a recording will work._

(9:43 AM) _It didn’t work. The terror cannot be stopped._

***

(12:02 PM) **I’d suggest painting the outside of your windows, but that would probably take a lot of effort. And money. And would most likely get you yelled at.**

(12:05 PM) _Not yelled, only scolded. No one ever dares to yell at the blind man._

(12:06 PM) **Too true. But still, that’s a lot of effort.**

(12:08 PM) _You’d be amazed what I’d do to get rid of this menace by now. Painting the outside of my apartment isn’t even daunting. People have ropes and tools for these sorts of things, don’t they?_

(12:09 PM) **Whoa, slow down daredevil, no one’s hanging off the sides of buildings just to get rid of a bird. I admire your dedication, but there are other ways. Like… banging on the window repeatedly to make it go away?**

(12:09 PM) _Already tried it. My hands still hurt._

***

(5:47 PM) **I’ve got it! I am a mastermind!!!**

(5:48 PM) _Please tell me you have a way to get rid of it. The thought of it waiting for me at home with it’s horrible wings and awful beak terrifies me._

(5:50 PM) **Dude. So. Birds are totally afraid of bigger birds, right?**

(5:51 PM) _Right._

(5:52 PM) **So in theory, a tiny bird would be scared off by a picture or model of a bigger bird.**

(5:53 PM) _I like where this is going._

(5:54 PM) **So!! We could just put a cut-out of a big fucking bird right in the window. Problem solved! We should be detectives.**

(5:56 PM) _Incredible, you are a genius. Only one problem. How sure are you that this will work?_

(6:03 PM) **Pretty sure.**

(6:04 PM) _You took entirely too long to respond._

(6:06 PM) **Kinda sure? Don’t get your hopes up.**

(6:06 PM) _My hopes are already up. Don’t disappoint._

***

It’s around 7 PM the next day when Foggy knocks on Matt’s door, a smile on his face and arms full of 2D birds. When the door swings open to reveal his (friend? can they call this friendship now?) neighbor, he immediately gushes with excitement.

“So I’ve got like, maybe five birds here? They are amazing. You’re gonna wanna touch ‘em all over before we put them up.”

Matt’s grin is infectious and Foggy can feel his lips pull impossibly wider.

“You’re amazing. Please, come in,” he steps aside to let Foggy in and turns on the lights as he walks back towards a now familiar living room.

Foggy spreads the cut-outs on the coffee table with (more than) a hint of pride, while observing Matt’s journey to the kitchen, two beers already out on the counter.

“I put the distraction birds on the table if you wanna feel them up,” Foggy says, taking the beer Matt offers gratefully and settling himself down on the couch.

After cracking open his own beer, Matt takes a sip (holy _shit_ those lips) and maneuvers his way over until his shin bump into the table, then he reaches down to feel for the brown poster board. A small chuckle escapes him as he touches every bird, feeling the details in the wings and the differences in sizes between the five shapes. Foggy’s eyes rest unashamedly on Matt’s face, finding the soft dips and highlights on his skin as he smiles at Foggy’s work.

“I’m sure these’ll do just fine, Foggy. Thank you.”

Matt’s sincere gratitude doesn’t take Foggy by surprise, but still makes him flush and turn his eyes away from the other man’s honest (blinding and soft and pure) smile.

“No problem, I was happy to help,” and for once, Foggy doesn’t feel the need to be smartass to glide over touchy-feely emotions. He embraces them, because Matt is not only handsome but sweet and he seems to genuinely _like_ Foggy, and he hasn’t seen that in anyone in a very long time.

***

(7:42 PM) _You won’t believe it. I’m so amazed. The monster has not returned since you left, and I might get to sleep in tomorrow. Miracles do exist and everything is right again._

(7:44 PM) **Don’t sound so surprised! I totally knew it was going to work the whole time. My plans never fail, that is why I am the best at making them.**

(7:45 PM) _Not only are you a great neighbor, but also so very modest. Thank-you for saving me from the terror of psycho birds, however can I repay you?_

(7:48 PM) **Don’t sweat it, buddy, I enjoy making people love me. Besides, it’s not like the bird was that terrible, it wasn’t Birdemic level anyway.**

(7:49 PM) _Is that a reference?_

(7:50 PM) **Oh my God. You’ve never seen Birdemic? Of course you haven’t, who am I kidding. That movie is the worst thing ever created. I made film majors cry when I showed it to them.**

(7:51 PM) _That sounds exactly like the type of movie you would watch, honestly._

(7:53 PM) **It’s an incredible experience, I promise. I’m gonna make you watch it, and you’re gonna love it.**

(7:55 PM) _I’m not getting out of this, am I?_

(7:56 PM) **No way.**

(7:58 PM) _Then I guess I’ll just have to accept my fate._

(8:00 PM) **Damn straight.**

(8:06 PM) _Really though. Thank-you, Foggy._

(8:07 PM) **Anytime.**

**Author's Note:**

> sadly, my own bird did not entirely leave because of the big-bird-cut-outs. he only migrated further down the hall to the game room, where i can still hear him in the mornings. at least he starts banging against the windows around when my alarm clock goes off??


End file.
